-after the rain-
I fell alseep while putting the green mud on my face. Was ready to slumber but forced myself out of the bed to read. But while reading, i tore myself away from the book and took over this monitor. Wanted to finish up the stories of my family because i want to get into something else. But i enjoyed sharing about my family especially my grandparents. They are wonderful people.
I just read Simon's, Weizhong's and Sarah's blog. Wow.. lots of changes. Cool. All black blackground with nice font colours.. compared to mine... Sigh.. Why do people want to make HTML so complicated?? Anywayz--
So cool.. the rain has stopped and moon has begin to give her shine again.
Rain brings back the fond memories back in my grandparents' house. Because of the rain, my grandparents, uncles and aunties were have to be called to an early day retirement. I like it. Everyone would stay put in the house watching television together...
My grandfather is a great man. I will tell you why.
I cant remember how old i was.. there was once my cousin, Wen Shing and i got so bored that we went to ransack our youngest auntie's room. We took out her make up kit and declared ourselves young artists. Happily, we played wayang... terror stroke when my auntie came back and found me, only me, with that stubborn lipstick that refuses to go from my lips, she gave me a good treshing and chased me out of the house in the late night. She locked the gate, and there i was, outside alone in darkness.. the heavy concreted stool was my companion, giving me security as i leaned against it, seeking comfort. The next morning, i found myself sleeping on my grandfather's bed.
Oh yes.. more than this....
When we were studying in Singapore, he would come here often to visit us and bring us to the places my sis and i wanted to go and buy whatever things we want to buy. He was our santa claus. I always wanted to play his host because i live here.. but in the end, it always the other way round. He would bring us to swimming pool and wait patiently for us for an hour while we soak in the water. Whats more admiring was that he came specially just to bring us back to Malaysia to spend the holidays with them, and he will bring us back to Singapore again. He was already quite old at that time..
In Malaysia, every morning, he would let my sis and i sleep to the fullest. Breakfast would be ready on the table each morning without fail. I remembered i woke up early sometimes just to watched my cousins dressed for school and hoping that time would travel in the speed of light so that i can play with them again. I will sit on the sofa facing the road, watching how my three cousins squeezed on a motorcycle, while my grandfather drives them to school. Come to think of it, its really funny. Three little children, hugging each other from behind and puut puut puut... off they went...
While my cousins were in school, sis and i would stay at home practically doing nothing. Lying here and there and watching my grandfather work outside the house. He spread the rubber sheets and coco seeds on the hot bitumen ground to keep them dry. He always wear the straw hat and carry a shovel on his shoulder, just like a typical farmer. But to me, he is more than a farmer. I still remembered beads of sweat flows down his tanned back and it seems like every sweat was smiling because that was his livelihood. And had brought him so far...
Disturbing the nature was our forte.
We loved to catch butterflies with our bare hands, deprived them from flying, challenged each other in catching tadpoles and houseflies. My cousin, Xiao Di (same age as me, Wenshing's brother) always the winner of course. He is the smartest among us but naughtiest too. I still remembered the sickening bag of drowned flies he showed me after his victory. youckS! We gave no peace to the millipedes too. The sight of seeing them curled up in shocked made us feel shiok. Spiders! We like to make fun of spiders, tapping them down from our hand, suspending them in the air.. while they tried to struggle back to the top, we tap them down again. For me i would purposely wait for them to climb all the way up to the proximity of my hand, then i gave a hard tap and made them fall a big time. Well, their determination is what i have learnt.
There was once, one of my older cousin, who was an "ah beng" (Xiao di and Wen Shing's big borther), brought a few of us to explore er.. not a very deep forest which is just beside our house.. We stopped by a stream and caught shrimps and tiny fishes (ikan bilis, maybe). Ignorantly, we brought our 'harvest' home and fried them with salt, without the adults knowledge, and ate them. Thank God we are still alive. Haha. That was my first and last visitation to the forest. Quite a fearful one.. because i couldnt identify where i was.. trees was everywhere and most horrifying was that they looked the same. We ended the day by stealing our neighbour's papayas who lived behind us. We sliced it, served with vingear and chilli to the family. Hee. I was very young then.. think in primary four the most.. ?
Soon, we covet for toys.. but no money.. An evil thought came to us. We knew that my grandfather has a huge, huuge milo can full of coins on top of his cupboard. We decided to withdraw some unoffically. Xiao di and I was the one who climbed to the top and GRABBED as much coins as our tiny hand could hold.. We wrapped the coins with my skirt and ran out of the house bending forward, holding my skirt to 'protect' the coins. (my grandparents were watching television in the living room) Lo and behold.. the last thing we ever want to happen, happened... half way through the big living room, the coins came dingling off my skirt and fell to the the ground. My accomplices quickly pick them up and we ran out of the house as fast as possible, to our bicycle and rode off to the provision shop down the streets. I do not know my grandfather know or not.. but he didnt ask any questions.
On hot afternoon day, we would open our ears big to try to catch a ringing sound of bells. When we heard it from distance.. we would jumped out of the sofa and anticipate.. my grandparents would give us money (automatically) and the happy children would run out of the house, waiting eagerly for the sight of the ice-cream man..
I told you, my grandfather is a great man. =o)
Wow.. time passes fast! I targetted to sleep by midnight... I have turned into cinder and rags.
I will come back and pick up my glass shoe - You will know that my grandmother is a great woman. I will tell you why.
31 August 2003
26 August 2003
-blue sky-
He is handsome, she is beautiful. They are the perfect match on heaven and earth.
When i looked into his eyes of gentleness, all i see is love.
When i looked into her eyes of tenderness, all i see is love.
He is my hero, she is my heroine.
He is Cao Ji, she is Huang Qi Zhen.
I am born in the family of Cao. Cao2 cao1 de4 Cao2.
Im proud and love my surname. Not only because it is unique and rare, most of all, i bear my grandfather's name. (Of course, proud of my dad too)
I have a vauge recollection of my first five years of my life. But i know i spent it in Malaysia, under the care of my grandparents. I loved those days. The whole famliy lived under one roof. Big family. My grandparents has ten children. Very well balanced. Five boys and five girls. My dad is the number three from the boys side but is in the fifth position when all the slibings add together. The sequence goes like this: boy, girl, boy, girl, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy. Hmm.. im thinking, if my grandmother was to go on reproduce, maybe i would have another auntie? Hah.
Hmmm.. I dont think my parents were with me much in the first five years of my life. They were in Singapore working, trying hard to get me an entry permit to Singapore, i think. And only managed to get me in here only when i was five. But i thank God that i have my first five years of my life living with my grandparents. Though i may not remember everything, but i do know that i have stored those feelings in my heart. The feeling of living in an extended family having everyone cramped into a big house that soon to be outgrown.. doing things together, as one. I think its a gift, that my family is very united. When one was in trouble, the whole family will stand together and fight. Thats the condition that i was brought up in. I love the spirit. But what i saw at that time, was the fruits that my grandparents had bore so far for that time. Their past, to me was a glorious one.. i believe everyone has one.. But mine was an extraordinary one. Simply because i am born in this family.
My dad likes to ah1 gong1 jiang2 gu3. Whenever we got a bit spendthrift, he will yakdudodido.. telling me how bad life was when he was young. Though im not really interested in his lecture, but the stories always captivate me.
My father used to live in a small hut in a forest. Imagine, a family of twelve living in a small hut, at the same time trying to fight against any possibilities of getting attacked by any hungry animals. My grandfather would work hard in the plantations and my grandmother would look after the rascals in the home. My father would tell me how my grandmother would set up fire around the house when the night falls.. alone, to protect her children from any harm. How brave was she.They were poor, all they had was just a pair of hands, working hard to bring bread on the table and to do their best to send the children to school. The rest was history. Too much to elebroate on. I feel that its nearly impossible to write down every tear and blood shed to bring the family out from the wilderness to the promised land. To my five year-old memory, we were already living in a big terrace house with six rooms, owning a few pieces of land and plantations. By that time, seven of the children were married. I remembered i saw my grandfather and my uncles building the second level of the house together to accomodate the multiplication. Err.. only the paternal families were living together. That was really something, wasnt it?
Now, its not difficult to spot my grandparents' house during big festivals or special occasions like wedding or my grandparents' birthday. Cars would lined up on the side of the road, slowing down the traffic. But who cares. Ha.
From nothing, now they have almost everything. I admired them for this. To date, the head count of my e-x-t-e-n-d-e-d family is over one hundred. (Should i pity my husband-to-be? HAha)
Got to get on to work. Will continue again.
He is handsome, she is beautiful. They are the perfect match on heaven and earth.
When i looked into his eyes of gentleness, all i see is love.
When i looked into her eyes of tenderness, all i see is love.
He is my hero, she is my heroine.
He is Cao Ji, she is Huang Qi Zhen.
I am born in the family of Cao. Cao2 cao1 de4 Cao2.
Im proud and love my surname. Not only because it is unique and rare, most of all, i bear my grandfather's name. (Of course, proud of my dad too)
I have a vauge recollection of my first five years of my life. But i know i spent it in Malaysia, under the care of my grandparents. I loved those days. The whole famliy lived under one roof. Big family. My grandparents has ten children. Very well balanced. Five boys and five girls. My dad is the number three from the boys side but is in the fifth position when all the slibings add together. The sequence goes like this: boy, girl, boy, girl, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy. Hmm.. im thinking, if my grandmother was to go on reproduce, maybe i would have another auntie? Hah.
Hmmm.. I dont think my parents were with me much in the first five years of my life. They were in Singapore working, trying hard to get me an entry permit to Singapore, i think. And only managed to get me in here only when i was five. But i thank God that i have my first five years of my life living with my grandparents. Though i may not remember everything, but i do know that i have stored those feelings in my heart. The feeling of living in an extended family having everyone cramped into a big house that soon to be outgrown.. doing things together, as one. I think its a gift, that my family is very united. When one was in trouble, the whole family will stand together and fight. Thats the condition that i was brought up in. I love the spirit. But what i saw at that time, was the fruits that my grandparents had bore so far for that time. Their past, to me was a glorious one.. i believe everyone has one.. But mine was an extraordinary one. Simply because i am born in this family.
My dad likes to ah1 gong1 jiang2 gu3. Whenever we got a bit spendthrift, he will yakdudodido.. telling me how bad life was when he was young. Though im not really interested in his lecture, but the stories always captivate me.
My father used to live in a small hut in a forest. Imagine, a family of twelve living in a small hut, at the same time trying to fight against any possibilities of getting attacked by any hungry animals. My grandfather would work hard in the plantations and my grandmother would look after the rascals in the home. My father would tell me how my grandmother would set up fire around the house when the night falls.. alone, to protect her children from any harm. How brave was she.They were poor, all they had was just a pair of hands, working hard to bring bread on the table and to do their best to send the children to school. The rest was history. Too much to elebroate on. I feel that its nearly impossible to write down every tear and blood shed to bring the family out from the wilderness to the promised land. To my five year-old memory, we were already living in a big terrace house with six rooms, owning a few pieces of land and plantations. By that time, seven of the children were married. I remembered i saw my grandfather and my uncles building the second level of the house together to accomodate the multiplication. Err.. only the paternal families were living together. That was really something, wasnt it?
Now, its not difficult to spot my grandparents' house during big festivals or special occasions like wedding or my grandparents' birthday. Cars would lined up on the side of the road, slowing down the traffic. But who cares. Ha.
From nothing, now they have almost everything. I admired them for this. To date, the head count of my e-x-t-e-n-d-e-d family is over one hundred. (Should i pity my husband-to-be? HAha)
Got to get on to work. Will continue again.
25 August 2003
-cool night-
Two people had touched and changed my life. I truly love them to the deepest of my heart and admired them to the deepest of my soul.
I was brought up in a family of six. The eldest. The one who bears the responsibilities and the 'master of the house' after my parents. I love my family. Especially my two brothers, aged 10. Oh..they are going to be 11 in a week's time. They are my "bao bei" and i cant imagine myself living a life without them. My sis, twenty this year, is a cool chick. Though we squabble alot, but i love her the same.. (however still prefer the 'she' when she was still a kid. Cuter. =P) My parents! What can i say? I only have them, of course they are the greatest! They watched me grow while i grow with them. No one else on earth can be compared with them.
Its getting late. I shall stop here and continue another day. Well, if you think that the two people that im going to talk is my parents, then you are wrong. Well, dont get me wrong.. not that i dont love them as much.. but there are different kinds and level of love for different people. So stay tune! and find out more. =O)
In the first few blogs, its just more of a history lesson. But i promise to make it interesting.
Two people had touched and changed my life. I truly love them to the deepest of my heart and admired them to the deepest of my soul.
I was brought up in a family of six. The eldest. The one who bears the responsibilities and the 'master of the house' after my parents. I love my family. Especially my two brothers, aged 10. Oh..they are going to be 11 in a week's time. They are my "bao bei" and i cant imagine myself living a life without them. My sis, twenty this year, is a cool chick. Though we squabble alot, but i love her the same.. (however still prefer the 'she' when she was still a kid. Cuter. =P) My parents! What can i say? I only have them, of course they are the greatest! They watched me grow while i grow with them. No one else on earth can be compared with them.
Its getting late. I shall stop here and continue another day. Well, if you think that the two people that im going to talk is my parents, then you are wrong. Well, dont get me wrong.. not that i dont love them as much.. but there are different kinds and level of love for different people. So stay tune! and find out more. =O)
In the first few blogs, its just more of a history lesson. But i promise to make it interesting.
19 August 2003
-Blue sky serenaded with cottony clouds-
Language.
Tamil is a language.
French is a language.
English is a language.
Spanish is a language.
Mandarin is a language.
Today, let me introduce to you my fave language - Music.
Im always amused by Music. You can do so many things with just seven notes. Seven. Perfect number. Thus, i consider Music as a perfect language. Music conveys unspokenable words and words that cannot be fully expressed by words alone. Most of all, its an universal language where there is no boundary to whatsoever contingent you are from. Music, is amazing.
When the drum rolls and the trumpet sound.. even the most cynic Singaporean would feel proud as a Singaporean while the whole stadium filled with patrotic spirit when the music begins to roar. Im not a "pure" Singaporean, yet, i do feel proud of this nation everytime when the people gathers and sing the National Anthem with pride. Music, unites the hearts of people together.
Music is without form. It enters into the hearts of man, the spirit of man. Music has strings attached to our deepest soul. It has the ability to make you happy, make you bitter, make you cry, make you high.. Music brings back memories, heals and sometimes hurts.
Has Beethoven ever heard a single melody in his life?
No. He was born deaf. Yet he was able to compose wonderful pieces that sang through the ages.
Music, is in the spirit. I believe everyone has a melody in his spirit.
Dont be too taken in by the cares of this world, take time to hear the song that is within you.
A melody that represents you, a melody that belongs to you.
A melody of life.
Music, is for life.
Im sorry that i have taunted you all with Forrest Gump that whole night... but you have not heard whats is within me... so let me touch that piano!!!
Let me birth forth a song. A song about You, a song that touches eternity..
Let me birth forth a song. My story.
Music only lives when the notes fly off the page and soar into glorious sound.
Language.
Tamil is a language.
French is a language.
English is a language.
Spanish is a language.
Mandarin is a language.
Today, let me introduce to you my fave language - Music.
Im always amused by Music. You can do so many things with just seven notes. Seven. Perfect number. Thus, i consider Music as a perfect language. Music conveys unspokenable words and words that cannot be fully expressed by words alone. Most of all, its an universal language where there is no boundary to whatsoever contingent you are from. Music, is amazing.
When the drum rolls and the trumpet sound.. even the most cynic Singaporean would feel proud as a Singaporean while the whole stadium filled with patrotic spirit when the music begins to roar. Im not a "pure" Singaporean, yet, i do feel proud of this nation everytime when the people gathers and sing the National Anthem with pride. Music, unites the hearts of people together.
Music is without form. It enters into the hearts of man, the spirit of man. Music has strings attached to our deepest soul. It has the ability to make you happy, make you bitter, make you cry, make you high.. Music brings back memories, heals and sometimes hurts.
Has Beethoven ever heard a single melody in his life?
No. He was born deaf. Yet he was able to compose wonderful pieces that sang through the ages.
Music, is in the spirit. I believe everyone has a melody in his spirit.
Dont be too taken in by the cares of this world, take time to hear the song that is within you.
A melody that represents you, a melody that belongs to you.
A melody of life.
Music, is for life.
Im sorry that i have taunted you all with Forrest Gump that whole night... but you have not heard whats is within me... so let me touch that piano!!!
Let me birth forth a song. A song about You, a song that touches eternity..
Let me birth forth a song. My story.
Music only lives when the notes fly off the page and soar into glorious sound.
17 August 2003
-Rainy Night-
I love rainy night. Cool and sweet slumber.
I love rain. It bathes the polluted earth and give it a refreshing smell of sweet freshness, a feeling of cleanliness.
It brings down greetings from above. How sweet is the spattering sound.. as the rain falls, gently forming beautiful curtains on the full height window panels.. A cushioned couch, a cup of hot chocolate, soft music and a book would complete the picture. Ahh.. Oh! i forgot to add myself. Hee.
I was told that when a maiden is sad, the sky would drop tears as rain from heaven. Maybe.
I think, rain has healing power. Rain is a language that heaven use to tell a wounded soul that He empathized with her, that He even weeps with her... Rain is comforting words that falls from heaven, soaking one with the words that never need to be said...
But rain can also be a wrath from heaven. Ferocious downpour and thunderous roar.. gives me creeps. Lightning is my fear. Yah.. for a grown up like me.. HEE. But i fantasize about them. Lightning is astonishingly beautiful. Its like a bridge that connected heaven and earth together. I think it'd be awesome if God filled me with His power as a lightning bolt... as in like... a bolt of pure power.. to be connected to heaven thru that bridge. (Weizhong) I fantasized that one day i might be so close to lightning that its strong +electrons react with mine and activates my brain cells and hence i becoming a walking encyclopedia. Hee. A fantasy is a fantasy. Ever since i experienced the upclose and personal encounter with lightning.. i only want to admire lightning from afar.
But i think i like rain because its something that falls from above, i think. That is why i love winter.. How does it feel when snows touches you? I longed for that moment.. when snow flakes falls gently on my face and melt in my warmth..
[Spiritual bits]
Cloud is the presence of God. Rain comes from water. And Holy Spirit is water. Think with me..
When we praise, our praises would be like water vapour that rises up to heaven, hence forming clouds, which is the presence of God. When clouds become heavier.. it begins to fall as rain.. Holy Spirit rains down... revelation? ^^
I love rainy night. Cool and sweet slumber.
I love rain. It bathes the polluted earth and give it a refreshing smell of sweet freshness, a feeling of cleanliness.
It brings down greetings from above. How sweet is the spattering sound.. as the rain falls, gently forming beautiful curtains on the full height window panels.. A cushioned couch, a cup of hot chocolate, soft music and a book would complete the picture. Ahh.. Oh! i forgot to add myself. Hee.
I was told that when a maiden is sad, the sky would drop tears as rain from heaven. Maybe.
I think, rain has healing power. Rain is a language that heaven use to tell a wounded soul that He empathized with her, that He even weeps with her... Rain is comforting words that falls from heaven, soaking one with the words that never need to be said...
But rain can also be a wrath from heaven. Ferocious downpour and thunderous roar.. gives me creeps. Lightning is my fear. Yah.. for a grown up like me.. HEE. But i fantasize about them. Lightning is astonishingly beautiful. Its like a bridge that connected heaven and earth together. I think it'd be awesome if God filled me with His power as a lightning bolt... as in like... a bolt of pure power.. to be connected to heaven thru that bridge. (Weizhong) I fantasized that one day i might be so close to lightning that its strong +electrons react with mine and activates my brain cells and hence i becoming a walking encyclopedia. Hee. A fantasy is a fantasy. Ever since i experienced the upclose and personal encounter with lightning.. i only want to admire lightning from afar.
But i think i like rain because its something that falls from above, i think. That is why i love winter.. How does it feel when snows touches you? I longed for that moment.. when snow flakes falls gently on my face and melt in my warmth..
[Spiritual bits]
Cloud is the presence of God. Rain comes from water. And Holy Spirit is water. Think with me..
When we praise, our praises would be like water vapour that rises up to heaven, hence forming clouds, which is the presence of God. When clouds become heavier.. it begins to fall as rain.. Holy Spirit rains down... revelation? ^^
13 August 2003
Metamorphoziz.
Its a good place to contain thoughts.
Didnt know about this interesting thing until Simon showed me his blog.. and im impressed by his good command of English. His ability in conveying his thoughts eloquently in written words has inspired me to start my own blog. (You can find his blog here: http://ooooooooo.blogspot.com/)Its always been my goal to be able to translate my thoughts beautifully into words. Maybe, blogging could boost up my confidence, for all to see and critics to come in, and season my writing skills as i learn to convey them into written words. Well, not to impress, but to express.
The greatest handicap in a man is not his physical disability.. but the disability to express.
I cant write with flying colours, but will do that with the simplicity of heart.
This, not just about me. But about you.
Stay with me. See the metamorphoziz in me... and grow old with me. =o)
Its a good place to contain thoughts.
Didnt know about this interesting thing until Simon showed me his blog.. and im impressed by his good command of English. His ability in conveying his thoughts eloquently in written words has inspired me to start my own blog. (You can find his blog here: http://ooooooooo.blogspot.com/)Its always been my goal to be able to translate my thoughts beautifully into words. Maybe, blogging could boost up my confidence, for all to see and critics to come in, and season my writing skills as i learn to convey them into written words. Well, not to impress, but to express.
The greatest handicap in a man is not his physical disability.. but the disability to express.
I cant write with flying colours, but will do that with the simplicity of heart.
This, not just about me. But about you.
Stay with me. See the metamorphoziz in me... and grow old with me. =o)
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